Jacks Speech 2008

How long did you spend on your hair this morning, I spent 2 seconds on mine... 1,2.
It's great to be a guy.
Why spend so much time on something that's dead anyway. Thats right, as soon as hair comes through the scalp, it is dead.


We have about 100,000 hairs on our heads, which grow about 1cm per month. So we grow a total of 12 km's of hair every year.

Remember the story of Rapunzel, the princess kept in a tower by a witch. Rapunzel Rapunzel, Let down your hair. Was her hair really that long?
Actually, uncut hair will only grow up to about 60 cm.
Some people can grow their hair to their shoulder blades, a few can grow it to their waist, but only one in a million can grow it to their ankles. Still, towers are a lot taller than that, so Rupunzel was, well, unbelievable.


Hair is all over our bodies, in fact the only places we don’t have hair are our lips, the soles of our feet & the palms of our hands.
You may disagree with that when you look at your father’s head.

Hair does come in handy sometimes.
It keeps you from getting sunburnt in summer and keeps your head warm in winter.
Eyebrows are handy too! They help keep the sweat out of your eyes. Eyelashes help keep dust out of your eyes & the hair in your nostrils helps keep dust out of your lungs. But it's not a good look when you see hair growing out of your dads nose!
& then there’s the hair that grows in your armpits, but lets not go there.


Hair can also give clues to solving crimes. Hair can tell people whether your dead or alive, male or female, & even what you’ve been drinking & eating.
Hair has been used to find out what really killed Napoleon.
But a scientist looked at 1 of Napoleons hairs & found that he had really died from a deadly poisen.
So next time you go to rob a bank, don't leave any hair behind.

I took a survey & found that 32% of the year 6 kids in our school are blonde. That may be ok these days but in Roman times, if you were blonde they would chop your hair off, put a wig on you & make you a slave. Luckily, times have changed.
3% of the kids are red heads, aka gingas, & they’re lucky they didn’t live in the 1500s. In those days people said they must be witches, & burnt them at the stake.
Fortunately beliefs changed & later on people thought it was lucky to run their fingers through a person’s red hair.
The rest of the kids, 65% have brown & black hair. But they don’t seem to have been mistreated throughout history. Pretty boring really.

How many of your mothers still choose what style your hair cut will be?
Short Back & Sides... Again
A short fringe to keep it out of her eyes... Not A Good Look
Take plenty off, it grows so fast... Yeah, So I Wont Need To Come Back For A Year!
It's time we took charge of our own hair.
So next time, go to the hairdressers by yourself, & tell your mum, keep your hair on!